Petzo

On our way to work one day, Alan and I caught a glimpse of a prominent billboard. Its main image, a heaping plate of black-tipped crab claws, was difficult to ignore.

That's when Alan said, "The next time we go out to dinner, let's try Joe's Stone Crab." So for my birthday this year, we made our way to the famous restaurant, deep in the heart of Caesars Forum Shops.

We were led to a booth from where we could see much of the inner section of the place. The restaurant, just like its menu, is straightforward. It wasn't ornate nor intimidating. The walls were a pale color accented with dark wooden beams. On the walls hung pictures from circa 1940s, detailing the restaurant's rich history which now spans almost a century. While Louis Armstrong's crooning provided background music, I couldn't help but smile. The waiters in their tuxedos reminded me of characters from The Sopranos.

For our main entree, we opted for the obvious excellent choice: steak and stone crab. We didn't realize that our timing was slightly off. Stone crab season in Florida actually runs from October 15 through May 15. Nevertheless, we savored every bite of the succulent seafood phenom. The stone crabs -- all claws -- were served chilled with the crab shell already cracked for ease of consumption. The best way to enjoy it, we discovered, is to dip it in the killer sauce a.k.a. Joe's signature mustard sauce. Finger lickin' good! Even the filet mignon with its special spices and the sides --creamed corn and lemon-garlic buttered broccoli -- were all magnifico!

The menu included some background history on the humble beginnings of Joe's Stone Crab as well as trivia information about the popular delicacy. I found out that:

1. Stone crabs are captured by trapping.
2. Only one claw is removed and then the crab is returned to the water. In about 12 to 24 months, the crab will grow back its claw into "legal size" again (about four inches from the first joint all the way to the tip). By removing only the one claw, these stone crabs can still defend themselves from predators.
3. It is not allowed to declaw female stone crabs.

To learn more, visit http://www.joesstonecrab.com/
Our dinner experience was wonderful! Service was attentive and yet unobtrusive. But I didn't want to leave without getting the name of the bread we were served with our dinner. So I flagged down a busperson and asked, "Excuse me. The bread that we had earlier -- was that what you call a baguette?"

The friendly gentleman who sounded like Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite quickly responded, "Oh, Petzo."

"Pet...zo?" I repeated hesitantly.

"Yeah, Petzo! You want some more?"

"Oh no, no, thank you. I was just curious," I said feeling a little embarrassed.

But I had a nagging feeling that I didn't get the name right so I asked again when our waiter came back to our table, "Is there a special name for that salty bread you served us earlier?"

He blurted, "Nah, we're not fancy around here. It's just pretzel bread."

Are you Elzby?

I’ve never been to my friend Wendy’s version of “Family Night” before. It’s a unique party concept: each invited guest is assigned to bring an ingredient needed to prepare a main dish. Last night’s party was Mexican Family Night and I was excited to go.

Like the theme suggests, the party’s recipes revolved around Mexican fare and the designated cook for that evening was Elzby. She was going to make, among other Mexican delicacies, the popular Posole -- a clear stew made of hominy, shredded turkey, garnished with Romaine lettuce, radishes, and oregano.

The invitation encouraged guests to arrive at 7:30 pm so that cooking could begin immediately after. Alan and I made sure we were on time. That is past my normal dinner hours so you can just imagine my eagerness to get started. By 7:45 pm, I must have greeted every single person who walked in the door with, “Are you Elzby?” Followed by a muttering of, “I’m hungry!” Though each time I was disappointed to learn it wasn’t her, my greeting made for an effective ice-breaker. I learned everybody’s names soon as they arrived.

Eight o’clock finally rolled around and alas, my hero came. A petite lady with long curly locks strolled in; carrying plastic grocery bags filled with what will soon dispel my pangs of hunger. She went straight into the kitchen as the other women guests trailed behind her. We were all ready to help make the most-awaited dish.

While the buzzing went on in the kitchen, the men were content with their favorite drinks and settled in comfortable spots in the living room area. The giant screen in front of them featured a UFC fight that kept their eyes glued to it. It was a relaxed and unpretentious social gathering.

Wendy prodded Elzby to show us how to make the appetizers. So she pulled out a tostada, which looks like a big round tortilla chip, then spread cream over it and sprinkled it with crumbled Queso fresco. She topped it with shredded Romaine lettuce and a spoonful of mild salsa verde. The result was an oh-my-god- this-is-incredible appetizer.

The ladies quickly formed an assembly line to systematically prepare the tostadas and hand them out to everyone. Apparently, I was being a perfectionist in the cheese-crumbling process. I was obsessed with making it pretty that Wendy turned to me and said, “OK, you and I need to switch places. You need to get outta there!” With swift movements, she crumbled all of the cheese and put them on top of the tostadas in seconds!

For the non-picky eaters, Elzby showed an alternative to enjoying this delicacy. She added refried beans, avocado, and chopped cactus. Either way was delicious! Some of us easily gobbled up 3 or 4 of them. Not long after serving tostadas, the much anticipated posole was ready for the taking. It was quite tasty too and I savored a bowlful. Dessert was nothing Mexican. We had yummy cupcakes from The Cupcakery and sang the happy birthday song to honor the celebrant Elzby.

But dinner was uneventful compared to the game of poker that transpired after. Six of us gathered around the dining table and the confusion that happened was just like the three jumbled decks of cards we had to start the game.

The distribution of the poker chips was a dizzying frenzy. We went three rounds in deciding which color represented what denomination. I couldn’t keep up. Much debate followed on who was the small and the big blind, and whose turn it was to raise, check, or fold. Everyone was talking at the same time about different concerns…and this was combined with some loving cursing, by the way. In the middle of the game, Alex questioned why the Joker card was being used and someone replied, “Dude, were you not listening? We agreed to substitute the missing 8 of clubs with the Joker.”

When things seemed to settle (or so I thought), I asked for a Corona. The lovely hostess Wendy obliged. Soon as she shut the fridge door, the bottle of Johnnie Walker Black Label on top of it came crashing on the kitchen floor. Shards of glass and precious liquor spilled in front of the fridge. Wendy who tiptoed around with her bare feet got yelled at… by everyone…all at the same time. Danielle rushed to supply the paper towels; Phil was on his knees helping Wendy pick up broken pieces of glass; and I was next to them using the paper towels to soak up the pool of Black Label. Though Wendy succeeded in protecting her feet, she strangely managed to cut her finger. She remains puzzled about it to this day.

Meanwhile, the ladies who were still at the table wondered, “What is that awful stench?” when someone shoved the sliding door open and let in a rush of smoked fish odor wafting from the backyard.

“Doug, get the vacuum cleaner!” requested Danielle. It was the last procedure for the clean-up. “What the hell?” was his reply. Yet he sprang to his feet and succumbed to the request. And soon the mess…and chaos…were no longer. So then Danielle threw out another invitation, “Any of you [insert expletive here] wanna play poker?”


If you are interested in the recipe for posole, go to: http://www.southernnewmexico.com/Articles/Food/Posolestew-aNewMexicoholi.html

Posing for Posterity...in the Kitchen

Working on a photo shoot, I had the chance to rub elbows with some celebrity chefs! This was in September 2008.

Tom Colicchio - The famed Top Chef
Location: Craft in Los Angeles, CA


The contemporary looking restaurant was just clearing up after the lunch hour when we arrived. Tom graciously welcomed us. We took a quick site inspection in his immaculately clean kitchen to pick our photo shoot location. After a few discussions, it was on with the show. I think he was more amused with how we tried to elicit fun and smiles for the shot. But our antics worked and we got the shot that we wanted in no time!



Wolfgang Puck - everybody loves this guy!
Location: Spago in Beverly Hills, CA


We arrived at around 2:30 pm and the place was still packed and the kitchen was still buzzing! We had to make do with the little time...and the limited space...we had for the photograph. But wow, what a blast! He's such a ham! He knew exactly what he needed to do in front of the camera. He held out a small pan with pasta, drizzled it with olive oil, sprinkled it with some parmesan cheese, smiled and posed for the shot and then chucked the rest of the parmesan cheese at the photographer -- just for kicks!



Joel Robuchon - Chef of the Century
Location: Joel Robuchon Restaurant at MGM Grand in Las Vegas


This world-renowned and multi-awarded chef is soft spoken yet he quickly livened up in front of the camera. (I'm such a fan that I get thrilled when he gives me the typical European 3x buss on the cheek. I have studied Beginner's French twice yet I was at a loss for French words in his presence.) Everything in his kitchen is like a work of art -- just like his culinary craft.